


Bonding Week, (otherwise known as the week Remus played an inappropriate song on repeat)

by Nonbinary_dude_chillin



Series: Sanders Sides Song Fics [4]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: 6+1 Fic, Also very slight gore, Explicit Language, M/M, Remus being Remus, Sort Of, but it's literally just Remus making a joke about it, mpreg mention, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:07:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26343112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nonbinary_dude_chillin/pseuds/Nonbinary_dude_chillin
Summary: Patton made up a week where they all bond with each other.But Remus sees it as a week to wreak havoc. And Logan is the victim this time.
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders
Series: Sanders Sides Song Fics [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1913380
Comments: 55
Kudos: 143





	1. Day 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! So this is supposed to be a really funny fic, but somehow I managed to make it slightly angsty sorry about that. 
> 
> Anyway, TW: Mperg mention but it's literally Remus making a joke.
> 
> So yeah, enjoy this small fic, it's Bonding Week so I'll update everyday for a week. Good luck.

Day 1

Remus skipped down to the kitchen, humming his signature tune. Spotting Patton he went up to the blue clad side.

“Hey pops!” He said, shrinking in size.

Patton turned to see a 10 inch Remus Sanders standing on his foot. “Ahh!” He screamed and shook him off, “Remus!”

“You should have seen your face!” Remus cackled, “I swear it was like you saw a bear! Oop! Dr. Suess who?”

“Dr. Suess was a mainly children's author that wrote books about things considered unusual at the time. He wrote rhymes, and was born on March 2, 1904.”

Remus rolled his eyes and turned to the side at the door. “Yes, we know Teach. It’s an expression.”

“Oh.” Logan adjusted his glasses, “I was unaware of this. Remus, why are you 10 and three fourths inches tall?”

Remus shrugged, “Why not?” Then added quickly, “That was a rhetorical question, I don’t need your 'science’. Besides what good does science do in bed?”

“How is that relevant to this conversation?”

“It’s not, I just wanted to say it.” Remus winked at the logical side.

Remus spotted his brother coming down the hall and shrunk even smaller, just to freak him out.

“Hellooooooo! It’s the noblest Roman of them all- what is he doing here?”

Patton sighed, “Roman, kiddo, it’s Bonding Week! Remember? The week where we all stay in one part of the mind.”

“The one you made up?”

“Yes! That one!”

Roman’s cheery mood instantly vanished. “Great.”

Remus taps his tiny foot on the ground, “You’re not even going to ask why I’m tiny?”

“I don’t think I want to know.” Roman retorted.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Aren’t we missing two sides?” Logan said, interrupting the quarreling pair.

“Virgil’s still asleep.” Roman said.

“And Deceit has something he’s doing. It’s top secret.” Remus added.

“What isn’t a secret with that snake?” Roman mumbled.

“His kinks.” Remus said mildly, “Well, at least not for me.”

A ‘eww, gross’ came from Roman, Patton dropped the bowl he was carrying and glared at him.

Remus smiled innocently, “What?”

The only one who didn’t react was Logan.

For some reason that bothered Remus, he always had no trouble riling the other sides up, but when it came to Logan he just couldn’t. And he hated that.

Right at that moment a side in a big baggy sweatshirt walked in. He looked at Roman’s face, the shattered bowl on the floor and then Remus, “Oh. Makes sense.”

Virgil walked over to the table and sat down with the rest of them. “Is breakfast almost ready?” He asked.

“How are you not surprised?!” Roman asked.

Virgil shrugged, “It’s Bonding Week. Remus walked in, shrunk himself, scared Patton, probably said something inappropriate and then this happened, nothing out of the ordinary.”

“... Fair enough.” 

Patton walked over with a plate of pancakes, “Breakfast!” He said, and put them on the table.

“Aren’t we waiting for Deceit.” Logan asked.

“Well, Remus said that he was doing something at the moment so he might just have to miss it.”

Once Patton sat down, everyone started to eat. Remus jumped up on a stool and ate like that, stubbornly refusing to grow to his regular height.

Everyone seemed to be pointedly ignoring him, even Patton, who had the idea to make a Bonding Week in the first place. That didn’t bother Remus though, he knew exactly what to do to make them listen to him.

He secretly pulled out his phone and clicked on the music app. Putting it on the lowest possible volume he played a song. Then he pushed it onto the ground under the table. This way it would be background music and nobody would know where it was coming from.

‘Teacher's pet,  
I want to be teacher's pet,  
I want to be huddled and cuddled as close to you as I can get.’

Remus went back to eating his food innocently. As if he wasn’t playing a very inappropriate song right by Patton’s foot.

‘Mm, teacher's pride,  
I want to be teacher's pride,  
I want to be dated, paraded, the one most likely at your side.’

Virgil’s head shot up, “Do you hear that?” He asked.

‘I want to learn all your lips can teach me,  
One kiss will do at the start,  
I'm sure with a little homework,  
I'll graduate to your heart.’

“Hey, yeah.” Roman said. “But what is it? Is it a song?”

Remus struggled to hold his laughter in.

“I don’t know.” Patton said, sounding puzzled.

‘Teacher's pet,  
I want to be teacher's pet,  
I want to take home a diploma and show Ma that ya love me, too.’

Everyone’s eyes shot over to Logan, including Remus’. But Logan was looking around for the source of the song.

“Here it is.” He said, voice muffled since it was coming from under the table. He straightened back up and handed Remus his phone back. “I believe this is yours.”

Remus scowled. He hadn’t gotten the results he had hoped for.


	2. Day 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter. I don't really like how this one turned out... so good luck!

Day 2

Everyone was sitting on the couches in awkward silence as Patton went to get a board game.

Well almost everyone, Remus was doing a headstand in the middle of the room. He thought it was quite impressive how he managed to hold it for six and a half minutes.

“I’m back!” Patton said walking into the room, “I got Monopoly!”

“Oh.” Roman said darkly, “The destroyer of friendships.”

Patton tilted his head, “What? How does it destroy friendships?”

“I don’t know. It just does.”

“How do we know that Deceit won’t cheat?” Virgil asked, pointing at the side sat opposite him, “How can we trust him?”

“You /definitely/ can’t trust me.” Deceit said scowling, “It’s not like I’m /actually/ participating in this when I could have other things to be doing. So there’s no way I would play by the rules and not ruin it for you.”

Virgil glared at him.

“C’mon kiddos, let's all play nice.” Patton said. “Get it? Play? Like you play the game?”

Roman grimaced, “That was really bad Patton.”

“I know, sorry. Anyway! Logan, will you please explain the rules?”

Remus zoned out as Logan explained, he already knew how to play. And besides, he’d probably be the one to purposely lose. Or just shout random inappropriate shit whenever he saw fit.

He focused on holding his headstand longer. It’d been about eight minutes, but he’d done up to two hours before.

Yeah, he had a lot of free time.

“Remus? What character do you want to be?” Came Patton’s voice.

“The one that sucks dick.” He replied automatically.

Patton gasped, “Remus!”

“What?”

“Don’t use that kind of language!”

Remus shrugged (although it was hard to do since he was upside down), “Sorry, it’s in my nature. Anyway, I’ll be the train, cause it looks like something you could stick up your ass.”

“Remus, I’m going to censor you!”

Remus smirked, “Oh yes, daddy.”

He glanced around, everyone had looks of disgust on their faces. Everyone, except for Logan.

Remus crossed his arms in the headstand. He would need to try harder.

Once everyone was playing the game, Remus thought hard on what to do. Then he got an idea.

When everyone looked away, he slid his phone out from his pants, (no he does not keep it in his pocket, he keeps it somewhere else,) and clicked on a song. Then he slipped it back in his pants.

‘Teacher's pet,  
I want to be teacher's pet,  
I want to be huddled and cuddled as close to you as I can get.’

Roman looked up, “Oh god! It’s that song again. Remus where is it coming from this time?”

‘Mm, teacher's pride,  
I want to be teacher's pride,  
I want to be dated, paraded, the one most likely at your side.’

Remus giggled, “You’ll never find it. And if you do, you won’t want to turn it off.”

Virgil pretended to barf in the corner, Roman shook his head as if trying to clear away a nasty image, and Patton looked confused.

Deceit glanced at him, and smirked a bit. Remus could tell that he found this whole situation amusing.

But Logan wasn’t reacting in the slightest.

‘I want to learn all your lips can teach me,  
One kiss will do at the start,  
I'm sure with a little homework,  
I'll graduate to your heart.’

Logan stood up and walked over to Remus. “Your pants seem to be playing a song. And it happens to be distracting us from the game. Stop the music.”

Remus raised an eyebrow, “Why don’t you Teach?”

Logan looked down his nose at the creative side. “What you’re suggesting is preposterous, I will not be reaching down your pants.”

Remus sighed, still no reaction. “Fine.” He grumbled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey! And if anyone wants just a couple of oneshots to read go check out Mel456, they've got a bunch of really good oneshots that take place after POF.


	3. Day 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go! Next chapter: done.

Remus had managed to squeeze himself inside of a thimble next to the sewing machine.

Don’t ask how.

All of them were playing hide and seek. But none of them had thought to shrink. It was only him. Just goes to show what you can do when you don’t conform to the norms of society and you think outside the box.

It had been thirty minutes since the game started, and Remus was pretty sure Virgil had managed to find everyone but him.

“It’s been too long!” Virgil shouted, coming around the corner. “Remus where are you?”

“Fucking my brother!” Remus squeaked from inside the thimble.

Virgil looked as if he had just eaten dog shit. “I don’t know where you are, yet you still manage to disgust me. And please never say that your fucking my boyfriend again, or I will bring you pain.”

“Oh! Someone's kinky!”

“You know that’s not what I meant! And where are you?”

“I’m over here!”

Virgil walked over to the sewing corner. “What? Where?”

“In this thimble.” Remus climbed out and stood on the desk.

“God. Just fucking grow again.”

Remus changed back to his normal size. “Is it my turn?” He asked.

Virgil nodded.

“Great! Then I’m using my turn for snack time!”

Virgil looked like he was about to say something, but Remus took off, sprinting past him.

He ran throughout the halls screaming, “SSSNNNAAACCCKKK TTTTIIIIMMMEEE!”

He reached the kitchen before anyone else. For a good reason too, he was determined to get a rise out of Logan. He picked up the logical side’s favorite book off of the counter, took his phone out of his pants, shrunk it, and stuck it in the cover of the book.

Then he went over to the cabinet and pulled out an entire box of sour cream pretzels. And yes, he ate all of them before the others got there, it was approximately 13.47 seconds.

He grabbed another box (they had a lot, sour cream pretzels were the sides’ favorite) and sat down at the table, eating them more slowly this time.

The other sides all gathered around and got their own food. Remus chatted with Deceit for a while. Even though it was Bonding Week, none of the others were really talking to them. That was alright with them; they were used to being alone anyway.

Remus glanced around, everyone seemed to be talking and none of them were paying any attention to him or Deceit. So he screwed his eyes shut and concentrated.

He did a mental fist pump when he heard the faint sound of a song start nearby, hopefully it would play on loop.

Deceit looked at him questioningly, Remus just shrugged and winked. The lying side rolled his eyes.

‘Teacher's pet,  
I want to be teacher's pet,  
I want to be huddled and cuddled as close to you as I can get.’

Nobody seemed to notice it at first. Remus waited with bated breath.

‘Mm, teacher's pride,  
I want to be teacher's pride,  
I want to be dated, paraded, the one most likely at your side.’

Suddenly Roman’s head shot up. “Remus!” He yelled, “I swear by the horn of a unicorn, if it’s that fucking song again!”

Patton glared at him, “Language!”

*No. The author is not going to make Roman say ‘English.’ For I am stronger than that. I shall not fall for such childish humor. And plus, it’s already in almost every single Sanders Sides fanfiction out there, so I will spare you.*

‘I want to learn all your lips can teach me,  
One kiss will do at the start,  
I'm sure with a little homework,  
I'll graduate to your heart.’

Remus had watched Logan closely throughout the whole time the song was playing. On the outside Remus looked like his usual self (demented and chaotic), but he was inwardly seething, for Logan’s expression was cool and collected as always.

The logical side stood up and walked over to his book on the counter. ‘Shit!’ Remus thought, ‘How did he pinpoint that exact position? Goddamn he’s good.’

“Remus.” He said, handing the phone back to him. “Your plans have been foiled yet again. Try harder next time.”

Logan sat back down, and Remus glared at him. Logan stared back definitely. 

‘Oh it’s on!’ The creative side thought, ‘I’ll prove that even you, Logic, can react sometimes! I’ll get you to lose it eventually.’


	4. Day 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter done! 
> 
> TW: mpreg mention, but it's just Remus making a joke about it.

“So, Remus.” Deceit said, sitting down next to the green side, “What is your plan with this whole… song thing?”

It was the next day, and all the others were off doing something else, Remus didn’t really care as long as he had the commons to himself.

“I don’t really have a plan.” Remus said shrugging, “It’s more spur of the moment kind of stuff, mostly when I’m feeling the need for constant attention. Like a child. Or a bottom.”

Deceit continued as if he had not heard Remus’ comment. “Because, I would /definitely/ not like to help. This whole Bonding Week is /totally/ not boring. I /do not/ need any scheme. So, /don’t/ tell me what you have in mind.”

Remus spoke fluent Deceit so he know exactly what the yellow side was saying. “Well, I honestly just want Logan to lose it.”

Deceit raised his eyebrows, “Is that it?”

“Yup.”

“Really? How many years have we lived together again? I know you’re lying. I can’t imagine why, you have nothing to hide. Right?”

Remus glared at him, Deceit always knew how to weasle information out of people, “Alright fine. He’s hot, don’t you think?”

Deceit smirked, “So you want to get him in bed then?”

“No that’s not-“

“I mean, you have been playing ‘Teachers Pet’ all this time, on a week called ‘/Bonding/ Week’. Or did I miss the message? Anyway, I don’t have the perfect plan.”

“That was my joke to make! And you have a plan already? That’s faster than you come.”

Deceit whipped his head around, “What!?”

“Oh please, your room is right next to mine, I hear all.”

“But how? The walls are soundproof.”

Remus winked at him, “I have my ways.”

…

Patton, or Deceit disguised as Patton, walked up to Logan. “Hey Lo!” He said.

Logan looked up from his book. “Patton? Do you need anything?”

Deceit pretended to seem nervous, “Yeah I actually do…”

Logan set down his book, “Okay. I’ll listen.”

Deceit flicked his eyes down to his pocket where Remus was, ready to play a certain song.

“Well, it’s sort of a joke.”

“Okay?” Logan said, a catch in his voice, “Go ahead.”

“You have to ask what I would do if we were farmers.”

“What would you do if we were farmers?”

Deceit giggled, “I would put our two lips together!”

Remus peered over the rim of the pocket, to his surprise Logan didn’t look flustered at all. Remus thought he’d at least be surprised. Instead he just raised an eyebrow.

“I didn’t peg you as the one for dad jokes Deceit.” He said, with the smallest of smirks.

Deceit gaped at him and changed back to his normal outfit.

“Before you ask how I know. Patton never hesitates before telling a joke. And you should really check that you don’t have a human sized lump in the pockets of the pants that Patton doesn’t wear, /before/ you put them on.”

Logan picked up his book and brushed past Deceit. “Is this the best you got, Remus?”

The yellow side stared after him, “How did he manage to point out two of my flaws in one scentance?” He hissed.

Remus claimed out of his pocket and grew again. “I don’t know. But I’m not giving up now.”

He ran over to the oven, turned the song on full blast and shoved his phone in. He was in a rage; Logan still wasn’t responding.

‘TEACHER’S PET,  
I WANT TO BE TEACHERS PET,  
I WANT TO BE HUDDLES AND CUDDLED, AS CLOSE TO YOU AS I CAN GET!’

Remus watched Roman burst into the kitchen. “Remus!”

The other creative side just cackled and ran away, leaving Roman to try and find the source of the noise.

‘TEACHER’S PRIDE,  
I WANT TO BE TEACHER’S PRIDE,  
I WANT TO BE DATED, PARADED, THE ONE MOST LIKELY AT YOUR SIDE!’

Remus flopped down on the couch next to Logan. “Hiya Teach.” He said.

Logan didn’t look up from his book, “You might want to know that I turned on the oven earlier for dinner.”

‘I WANT TO LEARN ALL YOUR LIPS CAN TEACH ME,  
ONE KISS WILL DO AT THE START,  
I’M SURE WITH A LITTLE-”

The music was cut off abruptly and Remus glared daggers at Logan before leaping up. He raced to the kitchen and got there in time to see Roman holding a melted phone. 

“Really Remus? The oven? That’s where you put food.” He fumed.

Remus shrugged and took his phone back, “It’s also where you can put children.”

Roman scrunched up his nose. “Eww! How are you related to me? Also, your phone is broken.”

“So is my water.”

Roman tilted his head, then a look of realization dawned on his face. “Remus!!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, I'm just curious. Do any of you name your sides? Or is it just me? Sorry, I just feel really weird about it.


	5. Day 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys this chapter doesn't have the song in it, but the next one will. I think.
> 
> Anyway TW: sex mention sort of, slight very slight gore.

Remus sighed, today he would have to try even harder, he would have to step up his game big time.

‘ _ This will have to work.’  _ He thought,  _ ‘But in case it doesn’t… I have a backup.’ _

Three minutes later, he was sitting with the other sides in the commons with the movie Aladdin playing.

He waited for quite a while, until everybody was immersed in the Genie scene. Then he imagined a mace flying out from the Genie’s hand and hitting Logan in the face.

A second later he heard a wizzing sound and a thunk. All the other sides whipped around and stared at Logan in shock, wondering what would happen. Remus glanced over at the logical side with glee, knowing that this time, surely he would lose it. 

But Logan calmly took the bloody mace out of his skull, then with a small woosh his face was back to normal. Logan sighed, “How many times do I have to tell you, Remus? The destruction of objects and physical attributes renders you close to harmless.”

Remus rolled his eyes, he wasn’t worried, for he had something else to try.

“Really Remus?” Roman sounded outraged, “Right during the Genie scene. That’s low even for you!”

Deceit looked calmly at Remus, and they had a silent conversation though their brains, something only Dark Sides could do.

**‘So that didn’t work. What now?’**

_ ‘Oh, don’t worry Dee. I’ve got something up my sleeve.’ _

**‘What? Pickled Poo Logs?’**

_ ‘Exactly.’ _

**‘How does that help?’**

_ ‘It doesn’t.’ _

**‘Then why-’**

_ ‘Just trust me. I have something in mind.’ _

**‘The only thing your mind is full of is dirt, dead flies and fluff.’**

_ ‘Oh I know. But those things can be quite helpful in these situations.’ _

‘Will you guys shut up!? I can hear you, you know.’

Remus and Deceit turned to where Virgil was sitting, glaring right at them. Remus gave a little finger wave.

_ ‘Hey Virgie! Done anything naughty lately?’ _

‘Shut up! I’m trying to watch a movie!’

_ ‘Nah. I don’t really like this movie. I think I’m just going to scream…’ _

**‘Don’t you fucking dare!’**

_ ‘AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!’ _

Remus watched both Virgil and Deceit flinch.

_ ‘This was all good fun, but I have a naughty plan to execute.’ _

He took his new phone out of his pants and clicked on ‘screen record’. He then projected his screen onto the TV.

“Hey! What gives!” Protested Roman, “I was watching that.”

“Whoops! Sorry, I was just watching something of my own.”

He was bound to get a reaction from this one! There is no way that Logan would stay calm! I mean, if your movie was suddenly interrupted by naked people, wouldn’t you be outraged?

Remus snickered and clicked on a certain video app. He watched everyone’s expressions change from surprise to disgust.

“Turntitoffturnitoffturnitoff!” Virgil yelled, shielding his eyes.

Patton ran out of the room. Roman ducked behind the couch. Deceit turned his head away, pretending to be outraged like the rest of them, but Remus could tell that he was laughing.

And Logan… 

Well, Logan was staring right at the creative side, mockery in his eyes. Remus glared back.

“Keep trying Remus.” He whispered.

‘ _ Oh, I will!’  _ Remus vowed silently,  _ 'I swear by all of the jars of eyeballs in my room.’ _


	6. Day 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay...... I have no idea what happened in this chapter... just, good luck I guess. Also I managed to make it somewhat angsty. I physically can't not add angst into these things! Ugh, it's like a frickin curse. 
> 
> Anyway I'm rambling, so good luck.

Remus stepped back to admire his project. He had worked all night. If this didn’t succeed, unfortunately he was out of ideas. Which he would never admit outloud.

Deceit poked his head into the sewing corner. “Remus I- What is that!?” 

Remus smirked, “Something to stick up your ass.”

Deceit raised an eyebrow, “Not very original.”

“Well, my mind is preoccupied with other things.” Remus hissed.

Deceit took a step back, “Well, I was /totally/ not going to tell you that I managed to convince Roman and Virgil to go on a date, and that the only ones left are Patton and Logan. You’re so /not/ welcome because you’ll have an easier time with whatever this is.”

Remus deflated, “Sorry, I'm a little on edge right now.”

“I totally don’t forgive you.”

“Thanks. Now! On to the final stage!”

“/Bad/ luck!”

… 

Remus found both Patton and Logan at the kitchen table, playing Chutes and Ladders. (Patton’s favorite game.)

“Heeeeyyyy.” He said, leaning against the doorframe. (You know, like cool people do.)

Patton took one look at him and immediately fled the room, yelling something about getting the holy water.

Logan however did not look up from the game board. “Remus if I were to look up would I find that you’ve dressed in some erotic outfit?”

Remsu snickered, knowing that this time, finally he would get Logan to lose it. “Possibly, why don’t you find out?”

“I’d honestly rather not.” Logan got up and walked over to the couch. He took his book and started reading.

'Perfect.’ Remus thought, ‘This makes my job a whole lot easier!’

He strutted over to the couch, grabbed the book out of Logan’s hands and tossed it over his shoulder.

“Remus, I-”

Logan was cut off by the sound of a song that was definitely over played.

‘Teacher's pet,  
I want to be teacher's pet,  
I want to be huddled and cuddled as close to you as I can get.’

Logan still refused to look up, as Remus started to sway his hips in time to the beat. 

The green side put a finger under Logan’s chin and lifted his head. Logan found himself staring at Remus in a very suggestive outfit: an entirely fishnet dress.

‘Mm, teacher's pride,  
I want to be teacher's pride,  
I want to be dated, paraded, the one most likely at your side.’

Remus spun in a slow circle, sliding his hands down his torso. Then dropping onto Logan's lap, he straddled the logical side, pinning him to the couch.

Remus expected Logan to at least be surprised, but he was just staring straight ahead.

‘I want to learn all your lips can teach me,  
One kiss will do at the start,  
I'm sure with a little homework,  
I'll graduate to your heart.’

Remus leaned down, “You know you want to.” He whispered into Logan’s ear.

Logan pushed him off and stood up, “Do I? I don’t remember saying that.” He raised an eyebrow at Remus who was now sitting on the floor.

“Whatever.” Remus mumbled. He stood up, imagined the music to stop and walked away.

Remus trudged all the way back to his room in the Dark Side of the mind, completely forgetting he could have just sunk down and popped back in. He snapped his fingers and his dress immediately changed back to his usual crazy outfit.

He flopped on his bed, finally admitting defeat. He couldn’t get Logan to react to anything. He lost to Logic. It was utterly humiliating. He was Intrusive Thoughts, if he couldn’t be intrusive and disturbing anymore, what was he?

Sure the other sides definitely found him troubling, but Logan didn’t. And that made Remus furious, Logan was so poised all the time, if he could have just unraveled him for the shortest amount of time…

But /nooooo/.

He couldn’t even do that.

Remus groaned. ‘I’m not going to try tomorrow.’ He thought, ‘I’ve done literally everything I can. He can win this one.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Glad that's over.


	7. Day 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty! Here we are, the final chapter. This week has been a very interesting one, but it is drawing to a close and so is this story.
> 
> Okay so, this chapter again doesn't have the song in it. Sorry, I just didn't know how to add it, although it is imagined.
> 
> TW: Remus not acting like his usual demented self. (I know that will trigger some people, including me) so good luck.

“Remus?”

Remus lifted his head, Deceit was standing in his doorway.

“How’d yesterday go?”

He sighed, “About as well as trying to bring Virgil back.”

Deceit nodded. “Well, you should stay here, Patton will totally be okay with you missing the final day of Bonding Week.”

Remus heaved himself off his bed, oddly he wasn’t feeling as happy or demented as usual. Go figure, as he had just lost to Logic.

A couple of minutes later he and Deceit were both seated in the living room with the other sides. They all glanced at him, as if wondering when he would start making his usual inappropriate comments.

‘Well, I'm not going to.’ Remus thought grimly.

Everyone was calm for a while, each doing their own things. Patton was eating a cookie, Roman was drawing an intricate design in a journal, Virgil was listening to music, Deceit was on his phone, Logan was reading and Remus was picking at his nails.

Remus noticed that Logan kept shooting his confused and conflicted looks. He opened his mouth several times, as if he were about to say somthing, but thought better of it.

Any other day, that would have amused Remus, but today, he didn’t really care.

They were all startled when Thomas popped in. “Guys! What's going on!” Then he saw the Dark Sides, “Oh wait… what are they doing here?”

“Bonding Week.” Virgil said.

Thomas looked confused, “What’s that?”

“A week where we all bond with each other.” Logan explained.

“I made it up!” Patton chimed in. “Although, we aren’t doing that much bonding.”

“Okay…” Thomas said slowly, “That’s weird, but I need help.”

“What is it?” Roman asked, suddenly more awake than before, “A person in distress? A mystery that needs solving? A hopeless romance?”

“No, none of those. It’s just… when Joan made a dirty joke, you know, like they do, I didn’t laugh.”

Everyone stared at him.

“And this is a problem, why?” Logan asked, adjusting his glasses.

Thomas shrugged helplessly, “I don’t know, I just thought I would laugh. It was a funny joke, but like, I didn’t personally feel like it was funny… Does that make sense.”

“No.” Deceit said.

“Okay, well is everyone doing alright? Is there a reason that I don’t have a dirty sense of humor like usual.”

Logan’s face lit up, “Oh. Yes I think I know the reason. Remus?”

Remus looked up, “Yeah?”

“Are you this,” (he pulled out a Flashcard,) “‘down in the dumps’ because I beat you?”

Remus glared at him and tried some of Deceit’s sarcasm, “/No! Of course not./”

Logan rolled his eyes, “Stop pouting, you’re acting like a little bratty baby.”

“What exactly is going on here?” Roman asked, “Was there a competition that I wasn’t aware of?”

“Not really.” Logan said, “It was more of a-”

Remus flashed a look at Deceit, who nodded and made Logan cover his mouth with his hand.

“Okay… this is getting weird.” Virgil said, glaring at Deceit, “What are you not telling us?”

“We’ll be right back.” Remus said, grabbing Logan’s free hand, dragging him into the kitchen and slamming the door.

He checked to make sure it was soundproof and turned back to Logan, who now had full control of his limbs.

Logan sighed and crossed his arms, “Is this another one of your attempts?”

“No.” Remus said bitterly, looking up at the logical side, “It’s not. Just don’t say anything to the others about this.”

Logan cocked his head, “What? Are you afraid that they would see you in a different light?”

“No, I-”

“Did you seriously expect to win whatever this was? I’m Logic, not a feeling.”

“You’ve been scared before-”

“Scared and startled two different things.”

“But-”

“What was your true motive with this? Why were you trying to get a rise out of me?”

“Why not?” Remus said, attempting at a sneer.

“I just thought, if you were actually trying, it would be a lot harder to keep a straight face. And don’t make that into a gay joke.”

Remus was speechless, Logan was just purposely twisting the knife now. “If you're so special,” He spat, “Why don’t /you/ try and get /me/ to react?”

Logan raised his eyebrows, “Is that a challenge?”

Remus narrowed his eyes, “Yes.”

Logan gazed at him for a long time, expression unreadable. Then he began to slowly walk forward. Remus stood his ground, staring him down.

Soon they were toe to toe, looking at each other indignantly. Logan took Remus' chin and slowly tilted it upward. His eyes locked with the green sides’, and Remus held his breath.

Then Logan let out a soft, low moan.

Remus could feel his pupils dilate. “Fuck.” He whispered.

Logan smiled smugly, “I think-”

Remus cut him off by connecting their lips.

Logan stumbled backward, surprised. Remus took advantage of it by winding his hands around his neck, and weaving them in his hair.

Logan regained his balance, and cupped his other hand to Remus’ cheek. Everywhere Logan touched him seemed to tingle and burn.

He kissed with a fierce passion, quite the opposite to his usual calm, collected air. Remus loved it. He loved the feeling of Logan’s hair under his fingertips. And Logan’s faint smell of peppermint, paper and ink. And Logan’s mouth on his, tasting of coffee and chocolate. 

When they broke apart Remus found that he was sitting on the counter. Logan smirked down at him. “So… Who won?”

Remus rolled his eyes, “I don’t care anymore.”

“Are you sure?” Logan teased, “Because I seem to remember /someone/ being rather upset before.”

“Shut up.” Remus said.

Then he pulled Logan down by his tie and slammed their lips together again.

And he could have sworn that he heard that highly inappropriate song, playing in the background.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, thanks for reading! Comments/kudos/constructive criticism is always welcome! Have a good day!


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